Finally Its End of 8th Week (:

Finally, tomorrow will be the 56th day.

By now, my body should have produced enough antibodies.

On the 12th day after my exposure, I got sick (one-day fever, nasal congestion, runny nose with a lot of yellow mucus, dry cough, back pain, weird feeling in the throat etc). I was not very sick then.

I have taken the following tests:

SD Bioline 4th Generation combo rapid test (27th day) - Negative
Alere Determine Antibody test (33rd day) - Negative
Alere Determine Antibody test (39th day) - Negative

I think the above results look promising. Based on my research, a 4th generation rapid combo test is conclusive on the 4th week and most people will be positive on 3rd generation anitbody test by the 6th week.

However, I know all these are false negatives. The symptoms I had experienced are not normal for me and it happened between 2nd and 4th week.

Actually I have already accepted I am positive. I think once you have accepted, you will feel better.

I am happy that I am able to find out I'm positive earlier. I trust my instinct.

Once it is confirmed tomorrow, I will arrange to speak to a counsellor at AFA and let them guide me.

I know Im Positive

I know I'm positive but the tests which I've taken so far were not able to pick up my HIV infection.

On the 28th day, I did a rapid combo test (SD Bioline) via finger prick and result is negative. I have doubt with this. Maybe my body have not produced enough antigen.

On the 33rd day, I did a rapid hiv 1/2 test via finger prick and result is negative. Should not have done this test since it is still early.

on the 39th day, I did another rapid hiv 1/2 test via finger prick and result is negative. Based on my research online, most people will test positive by 6th week but due to some reasons, certain group of people will take longer.

I should be the latter.

I will be testing again at the end of 8th week and 99% will be tested positive by then. 

I hope If I really got the virus, let this test be positive. I'm really tired with taking test after test. False-positives are giving me hope, false hope.

I just want to get a confirmation so that I can move on quickly.

Off

I'm giving myself a two-week off.

Its not good to keep testing and testing. It doesnt reflect well about my mental state.

According to my research, most people will tested positive by the 8th week. Testing at 12th week is a international guide line.

For the remaining two weeks before the test, I will play as much as possible.

I dont want to think about it. It will make the days harder.

I believe Im infected but just that my antibodies have not shown up yet .

Negative But Not Conclusive ...

Negative for the 3rd HIV test on the sixth week. 

The volunteer that was assigned to me today is a ang mo lady. After she had shown me the result, she affirmed I should be fine. She could see that I am very worry. Who dont?? Its a life changing event. She asked me to come back one month later.

She also passed me two condoms.

A negative result on the sixth week is not conclusive. The golden rule is always end of the third month or 12 weeks.

No point for me to take a test each week. I decided to take the test on the 8th, 10th and 12th week.

Stay Safe.

Another Test Later

I will be going for another combo test (4th generation) later. Today is the 38th day.

Runny Nose

I found an article online saying that runny nose is one of the HIV ARS symptoms.

This coincides with the runny nose I had experienced two - three weeks ago.

Now I believe I have HIV and just that the tests which I have done in the past are not able to pick up:

24th July (28th day) - SD Bioline HIV-1/2 Ag/Ab combo test (4th Generation) > Negative
29th July (33rd day) - Alere HIV-1/2 AntiBody test > Negative

Although the counsellor told me the test was more than 90% accurate, I have doubt.

The runny nose I had is not normal. A lot of yellow mucus.

I frustrated. I hope to get a confirmation so that I can move on. If I'm really positive, I would like to access to counselling and medical treatment as soon as possible.

Negative but I am not convinced.

Went to dsc clinic for the HIV anonymous testing on the 33rd day after my risky exposure. 

Entered the clinic and was greeted by a friendly volunteer. Amazed that he is an ang mo.

He asked me politely which STD (means Sexual Transmitted Disease) test I would like to take. I told him I wanted to take HIV test. The cost is $30 for a standard HIV antibody test. He issued me a ticket with a number on it which will be used to identify me. He also asked me to fill up a survey about my sexual health.

I entered one of the counselling room after my number was called. The counsellor is a guy. He asked me about my sexual health and what have made me to come here for the HIV test. I told him about my risky exposure and the symptoms I was having. He told me he was not concerned about the symptoms I was having. Because to him, it was more like a normal flu. He was more concerned about the person who I had sex with.

After the counselling, I went into another room for the blood test. It was a simple test. He collected my blood via a finger prick device.

I was asked to wait outside. After about 10 minutes, the counsellor called me into the same counselling room again. 

The result was negative and he told me 99% I am not infected.

I am not convinced because the symptoms I am still experiencing now are not normal. Runny nose with a lot of yellow mucus, a strange one-day fever, stiff neck etc

After some research on the Internet, many studies said that rapid test is not accurate and may not pick up those who has just been infected.

I decided to take another test on the 8th week. Two weeks later.

Negative on the 28th day

On the 28th day of my high-risk exposure, the test result by SD Bioline Ab/Ag combo test via a finger prick device was negative.

However, I am doubt with the result. My running nose never heal, muscle ache on my back, constant sweating, feeling chill most of the time, numbness from neck to certain parts of my face persist, groin and armpit pain etc

Even after the result, I still have all these symptoms. The yellow mucus from my nasal discharge never improve. I should be belonging to those type who never get a positive result by the fourth week.

I will be going to test later again which is the 33 days since my exposure.

HIV is not a death sentence. It is a chronic disease that can be managed. However, you have to take care of your body well and who wont? I have to eat medicine everyday. I will not die immediately and I can live long, very long.

The correct thing now is get a confirmation so that I can move on and get treated as soon as possible.

Going to Testing Site

As of today, the remaining symptoms include runny nose, something in my throat that is making me to cough and a swollen lymph node at the right hand side of my neck, about 1cm in diameter.

I think I'm am infected based on the symptoms because these are HIV ARS symptoms and they appeared within the period (2-4 weeks). Although a lot of people in forums said I will be negative, I am not optimistic.

What done has been done. No point thinking back. Thinking back could only make me sad and harder to move on.

I just want to get a confirmation so that I can proceed with the treatment, listen to advice and see what can be done to improve my life.

Wish me good luck. Keep you all updated.

Test

Few more hours before the test.

Although I've prepare for the worse, I am not sure whether I can handle the shock. It is pointless to think about the mistake. Would I be so lucky to be infected? One shot one kill?

I'm suffering from post nasal drip. Hate the itchy throat. Keep making me cough. I just found out that coffee will worsen coughing because coffee is dehydrating.

I hate Satan. He has been hiding behind me and strike me when time is opportune. Dear God, please forgive me for listening to Satan. You have been providing everything to me but Satan always want to destroy everything.

Running Nose

Running nose ...

I realised the mucus is little yellowish but not a lot. No matter what, this is not a good sign isn't it? After one week, my running nose is back. It seems like my immune system has been compromised.

While touching my neck, I realised there is a part that is painful. It seems like a small bean. Is it a swollen lymph node? Swollen lymph node is a sign of HIVearly infection.

Tomorrow is the 28th day after my high risk exposure. I will be going for a test. If it is positive, I will seek help as soon as possible and definitely need time to adapt. I'm not going to give up my entire life. HIV is not a death sentence. It is a chronic disease.

Runny Nose

Yellow mucus is back. Not a good sign.

A Normal Day

Went to gym in the afternoon followed by a short stroll in the evening.

Today is a normal day for me. Nothing special. Although it is a normal day, I feel blissful. Would days be normal to me after this Friday when I will go for my HIV test.

So far I am quite optimistic. I have plans if I am HIV positive.

Headache continues today. 

Dear heavenly father, I have let you down for listening to Satan who has been hiding behind and strike me when I am off guard. Please forgive me father. 

4th Week

Today is not a good day.

Having headache throughout the day. Maybe due to my anxiety or because I have been thinking too much? I don't know.

One part of my backbone started to feel pain too.

For the past few days, I had went to several places to feel, to see, to think etc This is because my life will change on this Friday when I got my confirmation.

I told myself I have to be strong to face all consequences because I am a man. You do, you bear.

Maybe life will be much more simple as a HIV+ person. I dont have to worry about girlfriend or wife. I can just focus on other areas such as career etc. HIV is not a death sentence. I need to take care of my health more and pills will be my best friend after this Friday.

Since 27th June, I have been doing some research on whether I will be HIV+. It seems like being negative has higher possibilities. Yellow mucus and sinus symptoms which I had earlier are not HIV early symptoms. Someone also told me that if you are able to touch your condom when you pulled out your penis from her, you are safe even though it was only 1/4 covered. If the condom is inside her and she needs to dig out, then I will be very risky because it shows that the condom is totally out when you are inside her. HIV ARS should last at least a week but my fever only lasted one day.

Seems like higher odds Im ok provided the condoms were not broken. I dont know.

Last weekend

This is probably the last weekend that I think I am still possible to be HIV negative.

For the past few weeks, the word "HIV" has been appearing in my mind. Almost every minutes throughout the day. Incredible isn't it? Never keep thinking of something in such a manner.

Any symptoms today? Except some discomfort in my throat, nothing else. According to my research online, most people will develop some flu-like symptoms 2-4 weeks after infection but not everyone will have symptoms.

But it is definitely a good sign if there are no symptoms.

Will I have a chance?

Today is Friday

Woke up at 9am today.

Exactly 7 days to my HIV test day. Feeling very normal today as there are no symptoms.

I posted a question on http://www.askdrtan.com/forum/view and Dr Tan replied. I have been wondering why HIV is still rising in Singapore although we have been very well educated since young what is safe sex. Apparently, people are still infected even with condom is used!

Sometimes I think I am infected because of the symptoms. Sometimes I think I am on the safe side. Maybe that's why I am having headache.

Only testing can tell you the truth!

Introduction

Hi all,

I am a 34-year-old guy living in Singapore. Working as an engineer. Very likely, I am a HIV carrier.

Why very likely? This is because I had a high-risk exposure on 28th June 2014. Although condom was used, something happened during the process.

Twelve days later on 8th July, I developed a fever which subsided the next day. However, from 9th July until 14th July, my nose had been discharging a lot of yellow mucus (never experienced this before, not so much!) and coughing which was more like dry cough. I am not sure whether my coughing is due to the mucus coming down from my nose. All these symptoms disappeared after my doctor prescribed me anitbiotics and phlegm medicines.

Maybe due to anxiety, I am also having headache. It can be due to HIV ARS which usually appear soon (2 to 6 weeks) after a person is infected with HIV.

Next week will be the 4th week. I will be doing my HIV test to confirm the results. Wish me good luck.